It’s been a very un-fun, tense couple of weeks. I’ve been writing proposals for my workshops and pitching them to corporate venues, colleges, and continuing ed programs. You could say that I got caught up in “taking my business to the next level.”
Last night was the first sleepless night I’ve had since I quit my “day job” to do coaching full-time and in the midst of my tossing and turning my business spoke to me. It told me it doesn’t want the pressure of having to make a lot of money. My business is exhausted by all the affirmations, meditations, and visualizations regarding how much money it can pull in and how big and successful it gets. My business just wants to be left alone and do its thing.
So I decided to listen to it and let it off the hook. I told it that it is under no obligation to make money or even provide me with a living wage. I told it that I love it madly and that I want it to be comfortable and that I will do whatever it takes to insure that. Immediately, the knot I’ve had in my stomach for the last two weeks dissolved and it feels like an enormous weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Taking this kind of action seems counter-intuitive I know. But I want to have the emotional space to do great work and I want to be at peace. By constantly putting expectations on my business I’m creating tension and all that does is make things more difficult. When we’re tense we don’t do good work, we often miss opportunities, and we’re just not in the flow. I want to be in the flow–that’s why I chose to do what I do. And if I’m not in the flow, what chance do I have of helping my clients get there?
So I guess I’m embarking on a little experiment if you will. This doesn’t mean that I’m not working hard or getting out there and doing what needs to be done for my business. It’s just that I don’t have a need attached to those actions –I’m doing them because they feel right and because I want to do them. I believe that letting go of the need to make money actually opens up the channels for abundance and allows me to have serenity–and to me that feels like total freedom. And if you haven’t figured it out yet people, that’s what it’s all about for me.
I’ll report back and let you know how it goes.